By My Brother's Deathbed
by FantasyLover804
Summary: What was going on in America's head when Britain lay dying after the Panjandrum accident? And what happened after Britain woke up again? Rated K-plus because I'm paranoid.


_**Author's Note:**_ Okay, first off, I'm basing this scene off the DUB version of the anime.  
I've been into the series for a while now, and I love it when we see a softer side (or, in better terms, "not-being-the-asshole-of-the-world side", as Canada might say XD) of America. I may be writing a few "thoughts" fics for Hetalia.

_**Disclaimer:**_ I do not own Hetalia.

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As soon as I got the call from Scotland, I raced as fast as I could to the hospital. I didn't stop for anything, and I'm surprised I didn't get run over by the cars I ran past. I burst into the reception area.

"Hello, sir, how may I help—" a cheerful nurse began.

I cut her off: "Where's Britain?!" I demanded, my eyes wild. It was quite possible I looked like a crazy person at that moment.

She blinked, looking a little scared. "M-Mr. Kirkland is in room number forty-eight. It's d-down this hall—" she pointed, "—then take the second right, and it's the fifth door on the left."

Remembering at the last second to be polite, I breathed a "thank you" then followed her directions. It didn't take me long to find Britain's room. I forced the door open and spotted him in his bed.

Holy crap, he looked terrible! His face was completely flushed, his eyes were closed tight, and he was letting out pathetic little moans. Tears welled up in my eyes as I halted at the side of the bed.

"No, poor Britain!" I gasped.

I looked up momentarily as I spotted a strange cloaked figure hovering behind the bed. It was Death itself, and it was cackling as it waited for the perfect moment to take Britain away from me.

Looking back at my friend, I blurted, tumbling over my own words, "Rumor has it that you were mortally wounded! Is that true?" Without waiting for a response I growled, "I blame Germany!"

He turned to me and opened his green eyes, and, to my surprise, managed a small smile. "No, you must not," he rasped, and it hurt me to see him so weak. He was shivering slightly. "I was in the process of making our new weapon called the Panjandrum when…well, you know how drunk the Scots like to get."

_So it's Scotland's fault! _I thought, but was too worried about my ex-brother to be angry. I leaned forward, getting closer to him, tears then clearly falling from my eyes. "Dude, no way! Come on, man! Hang in there, _please_!" I was begging him. Even though we argue most of the time, I still consider Britain one of my closest friends. "You can't just die! You still owe me a whole crap-ton of money!" _Why the hell did I say that?_ I thought, mentally facepalming.

"America…" he interrupted as I was about to apologize for my insensitive statement. I blinked and let out a small grunt of surprise. He was somehow still smiling. He continued quietly, sounding even raspier: "Listen to me. We've spent too much of our time fighting. But I want you to know…" He paused to take a few deep breaths, the flush on his face getting more prominent. I spotted some sweat running down his forehead, as well. My heart sped up in panic. "…I don't hate you. I know it must've seemed that way…" More deep breaths, and they sounded more labored. He was looking me straight in the eyes then, mine tearful and his apologetic. "The truth is I—" Death placed a bony hand over his mouth, silencing him for what I was afraid was the last time. The room became frighteningly silent.

_What? The truth is you _what_?_ I screamed in my head, but I had to keep cool. I have a reputation to keep, after all. Death moved its hand away, and I looked at Britain's closed eyes, longing for them to open. I leaned closer.

"Britain? You okay?" I asked softly, not really expecting a reply. I still felt tears in my eyes. The hero's allowed to cry sometimes…right? If I didn't care so much about my standing in the world, chances are I would've completely broken down sobbing at that moment.

I stared at his peaceful, sweat-glistened face. If you didn't know any better, he could've been asleep.

I stood up and moved to the head of the bed. I lightly tapped him multiple times on the head to try to get him to wake up. It occurred to me that I would do that same thing to wake him up during the night when I was little if I had had a nightmare or something. I quickly pushed the nostalgia away. _He's not your brother anymore, remember? _I reminded myself.

I felt a chill next to me as Death floated over. I had a brief moment of terror: was the Reaper going to take me, too? But it just hovered nearby, watching me silently.

_Okay, now how do I wake him up?_ I thought, not really realizing I was trying to reverse death. _Nothing physical will work, so I'll have to maybe…_shock_ him back to life!_

I took a deep breath. I knew if I acted excited at his death it would get him to come back. But what if it didn't work? And how could I possibly act happy at that time?

_No, a hero doesn't think that way,_ I told myself, forcing a determined look to come to my face. I took one more deep breath, gave a quick wink to Death, and then put on my best cheerful face, pushing away my tears.

"Aw, dude! Britain is totally dead!" I laughed, grinning widely and looking happily at the Reaper. I put a hand on its shoulder. Man, it was _cold_! "Let's go get a drink to celebrate!"

Playing along…or at least I _assume_ it was, Death nodded, and its bones rattled in doing so.

I heard a rustle as Britain bolted upright in his bed. He let out a miserable groan as he saw me feigning joy.

Pointing at Britain, but not looking at him, I said to Death, "See? I _told_ you he'd wake up if we did that." I heard a note of embarrassment in my voice, which was understandable. After Britain had just told me something huge like that he didn't hate me, I didn't want him to think I was actually _excited_ about his death. Death nodded once again, and then disappeared into thin air.

_Whew, that's a relief,_ I thought. _That means Britain won't actually die!_

Letting out a breath, I finally turned to Britain. He still looked pretty shocked.

"I'm, er, glad you woke up," I began, rubbing the back of my neck. "Sorry you had to see me do that. I didn't mean it, you know that, right, man?"

Britain blinked at me a few times, letting my words sink in. Finally he shook his head to clear it and weakly grinned at me. "Yes…That's quite all right, ol' chap." He was still raspy. "Um…Thank you for saving me."

I winked and gave him a thumbs-up. "That's what heroes do, ain't it? Always there ready to save the day!"

He chuckled, then leaned back against the head of the bed, never taking his eyes off me. I think there was gratitude sparkling in his eyes. Despite being woken up from death, he still looked pretty bad. I sat down on the edge of the bed.

"I'll probably need to stay here a little while longer," he told me. "Bloody hell, I still feel like complete crap."

"Well, I think—no, I _know_ you'll be okay," I stated. "You're strong, Britain! You can get through _anything_, I just know it!" _That's why I looked up to him as a kid,_ I thought. _…Gah, why do I keep thinking of when we were brothers?_

Britain looked surprised at my encouragement. "Why, _thank you_, America. That's very kind of you to say."

"So…" I couldn't think of anything really to say. What the hell was I _supposed_ to say at that point? But I suddenly thought of something.

"Hey, right before you, erm, _died_, you were gonna tell me the truth about something or other. What were you gonna say, dude?" I narrowed my eyes and looked at him carefully. He seemed to be milling over whether to tell me the "truth" or not. He let out a strangled cough. "O-Only if you wanna tell me, man." I didn't want to force him to say something he would regret. He was ill enough already.

"No…No, I'll tell you," he announced softly. I gaped a little, completely ignorant of what he was about to say. "What I was going to say was that…I still think of you as my little brother, America. I know things have changed dramatically since…since the Revolution, but…" He paused to take a few breaths, but they didn't sound as labored as earlier. "…but I think the reason I fight with you so much is that I fear for your safety. Sometimes you come up with the most bloody _absurd_ ideas I've ever heard—" He shook his head when I opened my mouth to object, and I closed it again. "Don't deny it, I know you know it, too. I just don't want you to get hurt or…or _killed_, God forbid." He cringed at the thought. "I just wanted you to know that, even though it may seem like I argue with you because I hate you, that's not the case in the least. I still love you. I still love you like I did when we were…_brothers_…" He whispered the word, and stopped to take a couple more deep breaths. "To me we never stopped being brothers. I really hope you understand, Alfred."

I blinked and let out a little gasp when he called me by my actual name. He hadn't called me Alfred since…well, since before the Revolution. I took a moment to let his little speech sink into my mind. _I still love you like we did when we were brothers…Alfred._

I felt tears come to my eyes again. God damn it, I hope no one but Britain finds out how much I cried that day. I would _never_ hear the end of it!

"Arthur…" The name felt strange on my lips. Even as a kid, I had almost _never_ called him by his real name. It would always be "England" or "Britain" or "Mr. Britain".

He glanced at me, looking surprised once again. I continued quietly, "I-I _do_ understand. I _do _understand! And…and I think I feel the same way. When I heard you were hurt, I realized it…hurt me, too. And I had to force myself to not bawl like a baby when you died just now!" On a whim, I leaned forward and threw my arms around his neck and buried my face into his shoulder, letting a few tears escape my eyes. He gasped. Man, he was getting a lot of surprises that day!

After he got over the shock that his ex-brother was hugging him, he wrapped his arms around my back, returning the embrace. He heard me sniffling a little.

"Shh, it's all right," he cooed, rubbing my back comfortingly. "It's all right. I'm here. I'm _alive_, thanks to you, Alfie." _That_ took me by surprise. _That_ was a name I hadn't heard in…in, like, _forever_! "Shh, calm down."

If I had ever shown that vulnerable side of myself in front of the other nations, I would have never shown my face there again. But I just felt like a little kid again then with Britain, since we at last understood that we both still loved each other. I wasn't afraid to let my softer side show…at least for the time being. And as long as no one uses it for blackmail, of course.

Finally, after a few moments, I leaned away from him, my tears gone. I grinned widely. "Aw, man, dude! Bros forever!" I held up my hand for a high-five, and he didn't leave me hanging.

"That's the America _I_ know," he chuckled, but his chuckles turned into small coughs.

I looked at him sympathetically. "Hey, I'll let you rest up now, 'kay?"

"All right, then. And, America?"

"Yeah?"

"I promise I'll try my best not to fight with you as much."

I smiled. "Yeah, and I promise I'll try not to be as stubborn with you!"

"Like that'll ever happen," I heard him murmur teasingly.

"'Ey! Miracles can happen!" I objected, and he laughed again, more strongly this time. "Shake on it?"

"Of course."

We shook on it.

**~Time Skip~**

Britain recovered rather quickly, and I was ecstatic to see him well again. But after I spent a few days with Canada and then with Japan, we all learned about the Picto attacks. And sure enough, Britain and I had our regular dose of fighting ("_Your brain's in way far outer space!_" he said to me), but it gave me some hope when he yelled my name in concern after I had been hit by a Picto in our last battle.

I'm not sure we'll ever completely stop fighting (that would be a miracle even bigger than making it snow on a southern island), but I know for sure that we'll be Best Brothers Forever! You can count on that!

And, since every hero needs a sidekick, I suppose Britain can fit the position…

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_**Author's Note: **_Sorry to disappoint you if you were expecting a USUK story. Depending on what day it is, my shipping of these two changes. Sometimes it's as lovers, sometimes as brothers. XD

Anyway, I got into a discussion with a friend of mine as to whether Britain was at a hospital or not, but to me it kind of looked like he was in a hospital bed.

Also, I actually watched the subbed version of the same scene, and I thought Britain was a lot sweeter in that one. But whatever. ^^ The dialogues were pretty similar.

Please feel free to review and leave comments and suggestions! Thanks for reading!

-Fanta ^^


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